3 reasons why...

One of my favourite poems ever begins with the classic line..

"How do I love thee? Let me count the ways."

Well.. its coming up for Valentine's day (and knowing me it'll probably take me that long to finish this post!!) and at this time of year, all thoughts turn to love..

As is the lot of a mother, when thoughts do turn to love your children (as well as your hubby lol) spring to mind and we are reminded of how different love can be across all the relationships in your life, your family spans many in itself, your parents, siblings, cousins.. Grandparents, your children, grandchildren etc..  


Well y'know me.. this peaked my curiosity and got me thinking.. and so today, we're talking love, of all kinds.


Why do we love some people and not others?  How do we decide who to love?  Do we actually decide or does it just happen?  What makes us fall and why?


Well unfortunately.. I don't have all the answers (haha.. sorry!) and all I can tell you is who I love and why I love those people in particular..SO in the spirit of all things loving I'm going to dedicate a few posts over the next couple of weeks to different people that I love and share some memories..maybe give reasons why I love them.


So who to start with?? well.. I know a certain person with a birthday today so she might be a good place to start.. 

ohhhhh my gorgeous childhood mate Ali.. can I really only pick 3 reasons?


well.. no.. so that buggers that up.  OK.. lol lets count the ways..


I love you because..you make me giggle.. hehehe seriously girl, you make me laugh like I'm 14 again..  I don't think we're ever not laughing... and sometimes, even when we're completely silent.. we're still snorting and stifling giggles and trying to look innocent. lol.. 


You're one of my oldest friends.. we've shared a lot thats for sure.  I think I was about 12 when we met.. (eep.. thats a while ago!!), we've been friends throughout the whole of our adult lives.. hah do you feel old yet??

Seriously, I remember my first day at senior school when you screamed my name across the dining hall full of students that all turned and looked.. I remember sitting in your bedroom listening to your sisters Helloween records, I remember scout hut discos and mad dog 20/20 and buckets of sticky pennies (ew!) and the Youth Club!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL and the swimming pool (and that car windscreen..LOL).. 


I remember boys..LOTS of boys..lol and listening to Bon Jovi in their fast cars.. and then babies.. and their first baths. 


"Jennie..it's Ali, I've had a baby.. she's called Robyn and she's reet fookin long!!!"


And then I remember more baby bumps and certain people calling me at work to tell me their water had broken and then giggling as I panicked and saying "I'm just kidding...sorry..don't leave work!!"


I howled with laughter that day when we sat on the bench in East Bierley having a smoke at 14.. dressed to the nines in my mums clothes & leather boots (shit I was in trouble for that one) and heavy thick make up.. (in the afternoon!!!) and the panic on your face as my Dad drove around the corner..and you waved your cigarette around and said "OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!" a dozen times in 30 seconds..


Falling out of taxi's.."Jennie.. we're gonna have to get up off this road"
walking home from nightclubs "Who's stupid fookin idea was this then?"
standing at the bus stop trying not to laugh at the old woman with the dodery head.. 
looking blankly at each other everytime Godo opened his mouth "Godo..wtf is Lierpoo???"


singing and dancing round the living room.. cheese and salad cream butties, marmite on toast.. sitting on your Mum's kitchen floor...teasing Cindy windy bottom.


The Spicey Hut.. "I'm sorry but I wouldn't feed that to my f*cking dog.",
the chippy... "Oh shit.. this isn't the Spicey Hut is it? sorry.. wrong door..lol"
the Wheatsheaf.. "Craig's got his knob out again..."  

flicking 2 pence pieces at me from the back garden "F*%K OFF!!! as if you caught that!?!?!"


Staying up all night watching scary movies...Who was it that scared the crap out of us by tapping on the window when we were watching Salems Lot? lol!!


my Dad called you his friend "the half-breed" cos your mum's from Oldham and your Dad from Barnsley..lol


Crap xmas cards.. "Across the miles" "seasons greetings from Cleckheaton" lol



then weddings (and divorce) and my babies..who it turns out adore you as much as I do.. 

So much.. so many memories.. so many giggles and so much love..


Sometimes we dont talk for weeks or months.. and still, we pick up again like we last saw each other yesterday...I dont think in the last 23 years that we ever fell out.. or even had a cross word..thats pretty impressive, I think..




Aw mate we've had a laugh.. Saturday night was up there with the best of them.. 


Neither of us really do photos (although there have been many of them..) but I'm gonna post one.. cos its recent and well I have to.. 

drunk as usual.. 


I love you my friend, you've been constantly there.. never doubting, never judging, just being my friend for all those years.. here's to many, many more..


Happy Birthday Babe.. xxx


p.s I'm totally crying with laughter after remembering all that.. piggin tears are streaming down my face.. and thats only the select cut.. I could have gone on for hours. xxx

Ummmmmmmm....

I can't think... no seriously, I can't. 

It's not normal for me to have nothing to say...well it isn't is it?!  I have an opinion on most things and I'm not really afraid to share either but not today... today my brain has left the building early and I'm afraid..I got nothing.

What's worse is that its not just writer's block.. it's "everything block".. I'm struggling to think of anything today, can't choose a book to read.. can't choose what to watch on the tv, can't decide whether I should just give up and go to bed or if I should sit here looking a little like this..

...for a little while longer. lol

I'm not quite sure what happened.. maybe its "baby brain", I know, I know my children being 6 and 9 now are hardly babies anymore but I've been in the company of that gorgeous boy, Beau today.. and something happens to a girls brain when there are babies present..lol we go all soft n mushy.. could be that I suppose..maybe I haven't recovered from the gorgeousness and the cuddles..

Or maybe I haven't had enough caffeine today..we know I don't function well without coffee.. but I can't change that now, its passed 11pm and I'll be awake all night..

I usually like to write at the weekend..most of my posts are 'created' (although not necessarily posted..) on a Sunday.  Sundays are great days for writing.  Long and lazy, usually spent in pyjamas  and with nothing to do but create (ooo.. and laundry lol) ...it's bliss.  This weekend has been a bit backwards as the kids were at a birthday party on Saturday so the visit to Strawberry Bridge to visit the fam. that usually takes place on a Saturday was swapped to Sunday.. could be that, maybe the old grey matter thinks its still Saturday, in which case it's going to be most unhappy in about 8 hours when it has to drag itself out of bed to get the kids to school, oops...

OR  It could be that its been a quiet week and there isn't much to write about having already told of my woe at the impending completion of the sale of no. 11.. hmm.. all valid points and completely possible of course, the posts made earlier in the week would naturally mean that there is little else to say come Sunday writing day...

I dunno what it was.. but would you look at that... look at all those lines I wrote about having nothing to write about... hehehehe marvellous!!

G'nite xx

When a house isn't just bricks and mortar..

change  (chnj)

v. changed, chang·ing, chang·es

v.tr.

1.

a. To cause to be different: 

b. To give a completely different form or appearance to; transform: 

2. To give and receive reciprocally; interchange: change places.

3. To exchange for or replace with another, usually of the same kind or category: change one's name; a light that changes colors.

4. To lay aside, abandon, or leave for another; switch: change methods; change sides.

5. To transfer from (one conveyance) to another: 

6. To become different or undergo alteration

7. To undergo transformation or transition

8. To go from one phase to another, as the moon or the seasons.

9. To make an exchange

10. To transfer from one conveyance to another

11. The act, process, or result of altering or modifying

12. The replacing of one thing for another; substitution

13. A transformation or transition from one state, condition, or phase to another.

14. Something different

 Change is scary..

"Out with the old, in with the new.." they say.. well changes are afoot in my life once more.. some good and some bad, as is usual for me and some will be harder to swallow than others I expect.

To begin with, the biggest change to befall me so far this year is that we sold the family home.. and by family home I mean my Grans/Dads house.  I have mixed feelings about this.. on the one hand I know it had to come, of the 3 of us children left now neither one of us could have used it.. our families are too big these days lol.. and there is also the fact that somethings are better moved away from.. but still, that house has seen a lot of lil Smith's grow and fly away and 1 or 2 return also.

Many many moons ago as I'm sure I've probably shared before, my Great Great Grandpa Fred (they're all called Fred, Sam, John-George or Mary remember??  or Napoleon lol) owned a mill in my home town.  Well mill owners then had a lot of workers and owned houses to put them in too.  There is a lil street that stood near to where the mill was that was once occupied by pretty much all of my family.. and when my grandparents got married they were given number 11.

That was in 70 years ago (eek!) in 1941, in the years that followed my Grandparents Jack (John George) and Mary (pattern...much?) raised their children there.. my Dad (Peter) and his elder sister (Sandra).. my Dad was actually born on the kitchen floor I believe..lol and as we all know by now he died 57 years later in the bathroom of the same house.   My Grandad died in the house too.. so lots of sad memories but also many happy ones.. my Mum lived there a while with my Dad's family when her own parents moved away and my younger brother Phil lived there in later years when Dad and he moved in after downsizing from our childhood home.

As children when we visited we played in the street outside.. on the grassy verge opposite where another row of houses had once stood.. family members passed away or moved on and soon there was only my Grandma left at number 11 but she knew all the neighbours and they all knew us, when Brenda, the lady at the end of the street got a brand new VHS player in 1981 we all went around to watch E.T. and sat in amazement at being able to watch big screen movies on the little tv in the corner instead of trailing to the cinema and having to pay!!! LOL

It was a magical place for me.. comforting, home from home.. warm, loving and a very happy place full of the memories of 3 generations and if I think about letting it go my heart aches..but I know those people are gone now and there stands the house, empty and run down.. unloved..no.. not unloved because it is loved, very very much... unhappy maybe?.. yes, unhappy is a better word.. an empty nest of sorts..and empty nests are always sad..

That house gave shelter and warmth to a very happy and loving family and now that there are just a handful of us left maybe its time to move forward.  I hope that it is restored to its former glory and could maybe once again be a happy home to a new young family.. if those walls could talk I'm sure it could tell some happy tales and I like to think it would be as sad to lose us as we are to leave her behind..

I doubt any of us will forget number 11 and the huge part it played in our lives.. I hope she's treated well.

Booker Prize anyone??

This is my daughter Heather looking all intellectual in her pretty glasses...

As you all should know by now.. I am raising a genius.

Now.. I know that every mother thinks her children are wonderfully smart and talented and I'm sure that all mothers go on and on and on and on about how their little darlings are advanced in every way possible and considerably better than everyone else's child..etc etc.

I realise that is how I might come across but I'm really not saying that at all..I am genuinely astounded by my child this evening..

Don't get me wrong, I knew before this evening that she's very clever.. they all are (see?.. Mums..what are we like? lol) but it wasn't always the case, no, in fact, at one time I was quite worried about these lil girls that came into the world 6 weeks early..and weighing about 5lbs each.. we worried about Heather most... first out and having broken her waters 40 hours before her birth she was treated with various concoctions to combat infections and was quite ill for a while.. wouldn't feed voluntarily, had no sucking reflex, coughing up bright yellow stomach bile at every feed.. pulling out her nasal tubes..laying motionless and just existing sometimes.. it was awful.. and quite hard going there for a little while..

Still, 2 weeks later they both rallied and were allowed home and our journey truly kicked off in style..  at 18 months when she would just lay on the floor and wouldn't sit up for long nevermind roll around or crawl or walk we were worried again and even though we were assured that its normal for preemies to be slightly behind (and she also had a big brother doing her bidding for her) they'd be caught-up to their contempories soon enough and before we knew it, it was time for school..

Heather loves school.. she reads everything, books.. leaflets.. back of the cornflakes packet.. everything...and it shows, she's way advanced in her reading level and is coming up quickly behind brother Jake who is 3 years older.. he's only a smidge worried ;)

So it should have come as no surprise really when she rushed in from school with some folded pieces of blank paper that she'd glued together in the middle at school to make a "book" for me to read.  She sat all afternoon and then some more after dinner and finally (with minutes to spare before bed!!) she was ready..

This is Heather's book.. bare in mind, she's 6 years old.. yes SIX.  enjoy.



this is the blurb.


front cover











How fab is that???  It's in her bookbag ready to go to school in the morning to show her teacher.. bless her, she's so proud of herself..

Booker Prize here we come.. ooh!! maybe the Nobel Prize for Literature... wonder if Richard & Judy will read it in their bookclub?? lol

A budding author in there making.. you read it here first.. watch this space. ;)

moving on to 2012!!!!!!!!

Right!!!! we're 4  (yes FOUR.. count them F-O-U-R.. 1,2,3,4..) days in to 2011 and I would like to declare it the shittiest year in the history of years ever already.

For why?  I hear you ask.. The festivities are only just over.. what can possibly have gone wrong just 4 days in?

Well.. firstly I'm ill.. and I'm a shitty patient. lol

I have the most horrific chest infection which has been caused by some sort of virus/flu type thing, which has exacerbated my asthma symptoms.  Basically I've had flu which has gone on to my chest and brought on my asthma and ...I can't breathe!!!  I have wheezing all over my lung area and crackling at the bottom.. which is a early warning sign of pnuemonia (sp?) apparently, according to my nursey friend who is more knowledgeable than a medical dictionary I swear.

This probably explains why I have to take 3 antibiotics, 8 steroids and as much puffer as I need coupled with pain killers, steam baths/head over a bowl with the old olbas oil etc and cough medicine too..  I can't drink, cos of the antibiotics and the steroids keep me awake all night if the coughing doesn't AND the antibiotics have given me the trots... delightful.

As always I look completely stunning (o_O!!)... my lovely lank and greasy hair that desperate needs washing is scraped back off my face and chucked up in a lil pink bobble, (hot I know..), I'm in my pj's, my house is a shit-tip and poor Grandad John is not only ferrying me between doctors and chemists and home but he's also  taking my kids to school too.


LOVELY start to the New Year!!!!  It can't get any worse can it??

Well apparently so.. there I am, up out of bed to get some breakfast (can't take all those pills on an empty stomach) browsing through the morning's gossip headlines over at the Daily Mail and what do I find??

David Tennant to marry girlfriend Georgia-Moffett




I'm off to put my head int'oven.

Catch up.

Ooof... Lazy, lazy Joosee.. bad bad bad..I have been.


neglectful I am.. and very sorry :(

Ok.. quick catch up before I round up the year later with a new year's post..


Well, the last time I posted was just after my good friend Christine passed away, it was hard actually.. I struggled quite a lot with that, the first funeral I've been to since my Dad's and that was tough too.. I miss them both deeply.  Bless them.

Unfortunately Christine's funeral was on Jake's birthday which put a wee bit of a dampener on it in one respect but also ensured there wasn't anytime for any wallowing or self pitying as there was a party to do followed by Halloween and various other things such as Bonfire night at Grandma's which was GREAT fun!.

November was panic stations as the big brother's lung collapsed and he spent many weeks in hospital trying to get better and recovering from an operation that left him with a scar that has convinced the children he was in fact, bitten by a bloody big shark.. he assures me though, that he hasn't been swimming off the south coast anywhere lately and judging by his inability to breathe properly at the moment I'm inclined to believe him ;)

In other news there have been babies born..I have a new niece!!  Her name is Livvi and she's cute and looks like my Nan! wtf is that all about.. why do babies always look like yer Nan?  its weird o_O..

Moving on...to more babies..in the last week, Jessica has welcomed her much longed for baby son Beau and Vicki a lovely daughter Sophie and they're both absolutely gorgeous and I can't wait for cuddles.. from the babies, not Jess and Vicki although I'm sure they'll get congratulatory huggles too ;)

and of course we've had Xmas..with presents aplenty and the obligatory kitchen appliance from my husband which came in the form of a pink chocolate fountain!!! better than a slow cooker but unfortunately.. it didnt come with chocolate and so hasn't been used yet...lol.

ok.. enough of my babbling... have some pics.  Afraid I cant add any pics of the babies as they're not mine and its not fair or responsible of me to post without asking... so tough...lol

Thinking of you..

I lost a friend today.  She was much older than me, older than my own mother even .. but still, a friend.  A good friend.

Funny, sarcastic and cheeky but also warm & loving when the need for it arose.  When my Dad died she comforted without speaking the words.. a knowing glance, a prod in the arm,  a secret, sympathetic wink, a smile.. all at the right moment and all much needed and appreciated.

When the kids were at nursery or poorly and off school and had to make the walk to collect a sibling there she'd be, at the gates with a smile.. always able to offer up a sweetie from her coat pocket and a hug or a giggle.. Angelina adored her from the moment they met and called her "Christine...my best-friend" ever since..

Christine you were a true legend, I'm not sure how we'll all go on without you mate, it was a genuine priviledge to have known you and to meet your lovely family too.  I'm so sorry that you had to leave us so soon.


We're really going to miss you mate.  Take care.

Jen2, Rich, Jake, Heather & your lil mate Angelina xxxx