and the world keeps turning...

Over the last few days I've been feeling my age. I'm not an old woman by any means, but in the same respect I'm not a teenager anymore either, my knees hurt and its harder to get up in the morning and when I get up off the floor I make that "Ooof!!" noise that as a child I remember all grown ups making as they got up!

I used to think that I was indestructible, that I would always be young and free and happy. I was ever the optimist - a fact that my husband will probably not believe as I'm the virtual opposite these days.

I was very lucky and I had a great childhood. My parents gave me many things, one of them was freedom of choice. My Dad always told me I could be what I wanted to be, go where I wanted to go (with the exception of down the Rio with Lou on a Saturday at 17 of course LOL) etc. I always felt that he would be there no matter what....

When I was 26 I had my first child and the realisation of my own mortality came with that and I became a little more careful with my choices and a bit more cynical and skeptical too maybe. Events this year have confirmed in my own mind that not only am I (and the people that I love) not indestructible but I am closer to old age with every waking moment LOL.

How does that happen? Do you wake up one morning with wrinkles and grey pubes (neither of which I have I might add...) or is there a specific time? My hubby's beard is gradually going whiter... when did it happen? I don't remember... I remember taking the piss one morning when he found a white hair in it and then the next time I looked he was as he is now.... how did it pass me by?

My son is 7... it passed in the blink of an eye... my daughters are 4, that was more of a blurry haze.. a "do everything twice, buy 2 of everything" sort of thing and I've had my cat for almost TEN years! Rich and I have been together for about 13 now...its gone so quickly.

I'm a grown up... at 33. I feel young in my head but I'm actually an adult now and have been for quite a while. I feel about 17 some days actually. but technically am I on the edge of middle age?

Where did it go?

Last week Lou and I were in the Rio dancing to Lurve bomb baby and chatting up hairy blokes, I'm sure of it... and this week we're married to those hairy blokes and we've a bunch of kids between us.

I was looking on facebook at some of the old pictures people had taken in some of the old watering holes we frequented in our youth, unfortunately (or maybe that should read "thankfully"?? lol) there are none of me...yet, I used to have tons of old photos but Rich and I moved around a lot in our early years (itchy feet-itis!!) and we seem to have lost a load along the way. There are one or two of us.. like this one


drunk in the Zoo Bar in Halifax (which has since been closed down btw), but thats about it these days. It hangs on the wall in our dining room to remind us of our youth - it makes me smile. In years to come I shall blame it for my crows feet. LOL

In fact there are very few photos of me at all these days, I tend to hide when the camera appears or I'm always the one taking the picture...I love photos, have tons of the kids. I should have mine taken with them more often, it'll be nice for them to keep I expect.

So with my brief wander down memory lane in to my youth passed its back to the parenting years... I've enjoyed both parts of my life to be honest... I wonder whats going to happen next?